Document: draft-ietf-ccamp-rfc9093-bis Title: Common YANG Data Types for Layer 0 Networks Reviewer: Thomas Fossati Review result: Ready with Nits I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed by the IESG for the IETF Chair. Please treat these comments just like any other last call comments. For more information, please see the FAQ at <https://wiki.ietf.org/en/group/gen/GenArtFAQ>. Document: draft-ietf-ccamp-rfc9093-bis-14 Reviewer: Thomas Fossati Review Date: 2025-06-11 IETF LC End Date: 2025-06-23 IESG Telechat date: Not scheduled for a telechat Summary: This document obsoletes RFC 9093: this is all correctly signalled in the header, abstract and intro. The changes from 9093 are clearly listed in Appendix B, which is great. The IANA section is good. In general, the document is nicely written. I only have a bunch of tiny editorial fixes and a couple of suggestions to make to the editors. I was unable to assess Section 3, as it lies completely outside my area of expertise. Major issues: none Minor issues: Section 2: Please check the definition of “wavelength-assignment”, which doesn’t look correct. I am very unsure about this one but here you go :-) Is the definition of common-organizational-explicit-mode: “A YANG grouping to define the common capabilities attributes limit range in case of operational mode and explicit mode.” correct? I cannot parse the “common capabilities attributes limit range” bit; is that the intended phrasing? Nits/editorial comments: * Section 1: s/model(s)/models/ * Section 2: s/ietf- layer0-types/ietf-layer0-types/ * Section 2: s/label- start/label-start/ * Section 2: s/the range of available nominal central frequencies are/the range of available nominal central frequencies is/ * Section 2: s/with the proper XPath which depends from where this grouping/with the proper XPath, which depends on where this grouping/ * Section 2: s/optical impairments limits/optical impairment limits/ * Section 2: s/Signal to Noise Ratio/Signal-to-noise ratio/ * Section 2.1: s/frequency slots associated to the WDM LSP/frequency slots associated with the WDM LSP/ * Section 2.1 (three instances): s/for models that supports both WSON and DWDM/for models that support both WSON and DWDM flexible-grid/ * Section 2.1: s/label-restriction list represents also/label-restriction list also represents/ * Section 2.1: s/The label-step definition, […], are augmented/The label-step definition, […], is augmented/ * Section 4: s/The "ietf-layer0-types" YANG module define/The "ietf-layer0-types" YANG module defines/ A couple of slight rewrites for clarity in Section 4: OLD These protocols have to use a secure transport layer (e.g., SSH [RFC4252], TLS [RFC8446], and QUIC [RFC9000]) and have to use mutual authentication. NEW These protocols must use a secure transport layer, such as SSH [RFC 4252], TLS [RFC 8446] or QUIC [RFC 9000], and must use mutual authentication. (Also, you probably want to reference I-D.ietf-tls-rfc8446bis instead of RFC 8446.) OLD These nodes are intended to be reused by other YANG modules. The modules by themselves do not expose any data nodes that are writable, data nodes that contain read-only state, or RPCs. NEW These nodes are designed for reuse by other YANG modules. The modules themselves do not expose any writable data nodes, read-only state data nodes, or RPCs. -- last-call mailing list -- last-call@xxxxxxxx To unsubscribe send an email to last-call-leave@xxxxxxxx
